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lyrics

I see another cow comin' on home with her fancy sunglasses and her fake straw hat and her bags got stickers from Alaska and Nebraska and the Panama Canal. She told us 'bout tea with the Oriental folk (which was funny 'cause I never heard that cow talk before) and how London's always foggy and the French are always snotty all the same. So Mrs. Crashaw tries to dig a hole to China and ol' Jim Bob thumbs a ride on a 747. Mrs. Pew finally has somebody else to speak Greek to. My best friend Hank went to find Jesus Christ 'cause the cow said she saw him up 'round Minnesota so I'm left drinkin' beer with Zeke who'd rather be a bird now. I can't see any other way to get by. That cow's even got me thinkin' I'm high. Everybody's goin' off to see the world. Ol' Mrs. Baker's actin' like a school girl. Sammy's done closin' up the store, boardin' up the windows and lockin' up the door. Last I heard he was runnin' for Jamaica like a fool. Y'ask me, everybody's gone kabonkers.

I can't take any more, for cryin' out loud.
Time to get the Winchester 30.06 out.
Maybe a shell in the head will knock some sense in;
they won't see Jamaica but they'll sure see heaven.
Mrs. Crashaw already dug herself a grave.
My best friend Hank can find out if he's been saved.
Pretty soon Zeke'll be soarin up with the birds
and that ol' cow'll be grazin' with heavenly herds.

Glad I stayed sane through that whole crazy mess.

credits

from Take On An Empty Mind, released December 1, 2001

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